Recumbent Trike Hall of Shame

I really don’t get some people. They can’t leave enough alone. They get an elegant, functional piece of equipment and have to turn it into …ummm… schmutz. I really don’t have a word for it.

Why do people buy a low-end Terra Trike and then have to add every bit of bling and gadgetry that they can imagine? Why do they feel the need to turn their trike into a clown-car? Why do they heap $1000 worth of accessories on an $800 trike?

Is it a need for attention? Do they need to compensate for their poor riding/driving skills to make other drivers notice them on the road? I don’t know. Most of them wouldn’t be caught dead off the multi-use path anyway. Who needs flags and lights when the only people that will see the are joggers and dog walkers?

Anyway, here are some photos of examples I have seen recently that need to be singled out for ridicule.

Just wrong on so many levels!

I don’t know if this is something for sale, or someone’s creation, but what the heck? A rollbar? No, just no.

Too many flags and lights!

Too many flags and lights! This guy (had to be a guy, he’s too handy with PVC) must want to pull over cars for traffic stops. Those lights are designed for use as replacements for road flares and are marketed to police and safety groups. And you can never have too many flags, right?

Trike with a clown-car canopy

Okay, the clown-car canopy is bad enough, but 30 lbs. worth of hard-shell carriers? Plus the side-mount bag; what’s that for, the six-pack?

trike with excess flags

Another PVC wizard. Seems to think flags will make him safe. Well, they will make him safe to be known as a dork. Note the two forward-facing lights on the roll bar to blind motorists.

Clown car.

Another one that I don’t know if it is a product for sale, or someone’s wacky enhancements. Mega-Clown-Car. I think I see a motor in the back wheel hub, and what is that on the front? A folding bike, or a wheelchair?

Faired trike

Okay, this one is borderline. I don’t mind a good fairing, but what’s with the honking big flag? And disc wheels? If you’re so into aerodynamics, loose the flag.

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Another clown car. Again with the disc wheels, do they save as much wind resistance as that drogue chute of a canopy costs you?

clown car trike

Yet another clown car. Where do the golf clubs fit?

Outrider Trike

Luke, I am your father…
Okay, so it’s an e-trike (electric assist) but, don’t you think the helmet and goggles are a little overkill?

I have mixed feelings on e-assist bikes. People justify them with statements like: “I live in a hilly place and I just need a little extra push to help me up.” or “I’d like to commute to work, but if I ride my regular bike, I get all sweaty by the time I get there.” or “They’re for older people who aren’t strong enough to ride fast or long distances.”

Then you get the videos used to sell the darned things with young, fit guys riding them like they are in the Baja 500, flying along at outrageous speeds.

I’m sorry, but putting electric motors on bicycles in most cases is a bad idea and will only end up in abuse that leads to more government regulations.

And then there is flags.

Why do people think that flags are necessary on a trike? “Oh, we are so low to the ground the cars can’t see us” is the usual response.

First of all, I hate to break it to you, but cars, with the possible exception of the Google cars, can’t see. It’s the drivers who need to see you and if they can’t see a trike in the road, maybe they shouldn’t be driving. What else don’t they see?

Oh, yes, this is the same logic used by people who want bike lanes painted on the road (even lower, how do they see the paint?) and who brake and skid into the ditch for a cat that runs across the road. (How do they possibly see something as low as a cat?)

The funny thing is, the people who ride these things rarely get off the multi-use-path. They load their trikes onto their cars and drive to the trailhead because they just can’t ride in the road, it’s just too dangerous and surely they will be killed or maimed if they do!

Their idea of riding on the road is once around the block in their suburban neighborhood, or the trailer park.

trike with trailer and canopy

Okay, this is not the clown car. This is the whole circus! And thanks for the handicapped sign. We’d never have guessed without it.

Yes, they sell these.

Yes, they sell these.

fairing

Sir, I think your fairing has slid upwards…

Flags Flags! What is with flags? How much is too much?

I can see some usefulness for them when you ride in traffic, where you might be
behind a car and they might not see you because you are below their window,
but a smart rider doesn’t put himself in that position, he sits to the left in clear
view in the rear-view mirror and with an easy escape route, if the car backs up.
The whirlygigs are especially annoying. They are mostly for the riders’ amusement,
because they are not any more noticable from within a motor vehicle than any other flag.
They are an affectation.

Lighted flag Lights on any bike are good for riding at night and the right lights are even useful in the daylight. But as is the case with many trikers, they just don’t seem to know when to say when and go overboard.
Made in the shade When it comes to finding things to attach to a trike, some trikers know no limits.

This is not just an umbrella, it’s a special one made for the purpose.

Me, I prefer my sunscreen in a bottle.

Serenity Here’s another canopied clown car. Why, or why do they take a beautiful, sleek trike and turn it into a golf cart?

Stuffed animal trike

Stuffed animal trike

I keep seeing photos of this guy’s trike on Facebook. Apparently, he has some sort of advertising business where he rides around with signs on the trailer. Probably makes enough for beer money.

Post No Bills

Overdone Trike And here’s another trike owner that just can’t say no to the bling.
Wood 1 wood 2 This guy’s other hobby must be woodworking.

Apparently, weight is of no concern.

Wood 3

Look carefully, the dog has his drivers license on his collar.

Just shoot me if I ever get like this…

Beyond words.

That’s all I have for now. I’ll add more as they come across my desktop. I’m sure there will be a steady stream of candidates for the Hall of Shame.

Posted in Cycling

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