Al's Blog-o-Sphere

In keeping with my contempt of the commercialism of Christmas, I bring you the worst Christmas song ever…

At least it’s not a commercial!

Bandanas are indespensible.

They’re a scarf, a hat, a personal cooling device, a neck protector in hot sun. They’re a washcloth, a towel, a cleaning rag. You can wear one by itself, or under another hat.

I used to think they were not cool. Something only a hick farmer would wear. (No farmers aren’t hicks, or not cool, either. That’s just the stereotype.) So I never had any.

But this year our robotics team used them as a fashion accessory to help make our team stand out and issued us each two, one red one and one blue one, to be used to show which alliance our team was currently on. If that doesn’t mean a thing to you, that’s okay, just know that I ended up with two of them after the competitions were over.

I started carrying one with me on my bike this summer. I perspire a lot and it’s been a hot, muggy summer so far. Having it handy to wipe the sweat out of my eyes has been indispensable. Recently, on a ride, my bandana got so soaked with sweat that I decided to rinse it out in the restroom at a park we stopped in. Not only did it feel great to wipe my face with the cool cloth, when I was done and had rinsed it again, I put it around my neck. Instant air-conditioning! The more I rode, the more it cooled me!

I’ve tried sweat bands before, but they are only so effective. Once they get soaked, rinsing them leaves them yukky and they loose their elasticity. Don’t rinse them out and after a while they are disgusting. Bandanas are much better than a terry sweat band. And you don’t need to buy wrist bands either. Just wrap a bandana twice around your arm and tie. Voi-la!

They’ve been so handy, I think I’ll pick up some more. I just hope someone doesn’t think I’m in a gang or something. What color should I get so that no one thinks I’m a Crip or a Blood?

Here’s a safety question for you:

Q.: When a pickup truck cuts in front of you and stops dead in the road to make a right turn into a driveway, and you are traveling downhill at about 30mph on a bike, what is your proper response?

A.: Pass the pickup truck on the right and hope he sees you and doesn’t drive over you as he turns.
B.: Pass him on the left, and hope there isn’t any traffic in that lane that will make you a meat pancake.
C.: Crash into the rear end of the truck to let him know you don’t appreciate his cutting you off.
D.: Squeeze your brakes for all you’re worth, while yelling at the top of you lungs: “NO! You @$$#Ø13 Don’t stop here!”

Continue Reading…

Dear Volkswagon,

What’s up with your commercials? You don’t get to punch someone for a Tiguan. And it’s called Punch Bug, not Punch Dub.

What’s with the “dub” business anyway? Dub is a form of music, based on Reggae.

Look, it’s a childish game that we’ve all played, but your marketing department doesn’t get to change the rules to suit your ad campaign. It’s a pop culture thing, and manipulating it to suit your sales ought to be a big flop.

Leave it to Wikipedia to have the whole story: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Punch_buggy

And what’s up with the name Tiguan. Tiger and Iguana? Oh yeah, that’s the image I want my car to suggest…